Virginia Utilizes Lesser Evil to Defeat a Great Societal Stain
Three consecutive overtime games, three consecutive defeats for the hated Johns Hopkins Blue Jays.
While saluting the University of Virginia for its 13-12 victory is somewhat nauseating, the reaction is easily subdued when one realizes that it may have put the nail in Hopkins’ season. The Blue Jays are now 3-3 with seven games remaining. It’s next four games — North Carolina, Duke, Maryland, and Navy — will all see Johns Hopkins as marked underdogs. Thus, even if the Blue Jays can win its final three contests, there is a very real possibility that Johns Hopkins will finish the season 6-7, far from relevance and the NCAA tournament.
Schadenfreude!
Even the Hopkins Youth have realized this very real, and very awesome, fact:
After the game, several Blue Jays players sunk to their knees or leaned against the stadium wall in stunned silence.
“It’s extremely frustrating,” said senior midfielder Paul Rabil, who posted a hat trick and one assist. “We’ve got to be able to pull one out somehow. That’s what we’ve been working on in practice, and we can’t seem to get it yet.”
Here’s a tip: stop fostering evil. As everyone knows, the formula for success is as follows:
Evil = Losing
Good = Winning
Hence, Syracuse sits at 5-1; Johns Hopkins eats human flesh and loses lacrosse games.
Connecticut, Georgetown Are Crucified On Easter Weekend
God bless the Hartford Courant. Long seen as an objective — and oftentimes unfair — critic of the University of Connecticut, staff writer Mike Anthony may have penned the greatest lead in the history of journalism:
TAMPA, Fla. — – It did not end pretty, a feel-good UConn season closing with images of despair and disappointment.
A.J. Price was on crutches. The Huskies, a proud and resolute bunch for much of this season, fizzled Friday and were left to walk off the court, heads down, as underdog San Diego began a wild celebration. Back in the UConn locker room, assistant coaches sat together and stared blankly. Jim Calhoun, while composed, spoke of opportunity lost.
If this was not stunning, it was close. For the first time under Calhoun, the Huskies’ NCAA Tournament ended with a loss in the first round. De’Jon Jackson hit a 17-foot jump shot with 1.2 seconds remaining in overtime to give the 13th-seeded Toreros a 70-69 victory over No. 4 UConn in the West Regional before 15,920 at the St. Pete Times Forum, a bitter final chapter in a season of growth and hope.
Simply awesome.
Editor’s Note: While poking fun at rivals is good for all seasons, poking fun at injured athletes — especially undergraduate athletes — is not. There is a line that demarcates humorous rhetoric and the unacceptable; reveling in injury is clearly in the scope of the latter. Thus, I take no joy in seeing A.J. Price laid up for six months with a torn ACL. I wish him a speedy recovery, and many more years of underachieving on the basketball court with his detestable teammates.
With regard to Georgetown losing to Davidson, all I have to say is this: I could not have have written a better ending to Roy Hibbert’s career.
